The Best Resolution is to never make them again

A new year represents a new beginning, which is why most people tend to make resolutions at this time of the year. It’s as good a time as any to figure out what you deeply desire for yourself.

But are you aware how long the average resolution lasts? 72 hours—about the same duration people stick to a diet. That means that on or about today, most people who proclaimed resolutions on new year’s eve have begun to abandon their plans for change. The reason for this is when we are looking at the big picture we can imagine how much better things will be if we are more fit, healthier, know more, successful and have better relationships. The rub comes when we get down to the details. It can be painful when meeting our long term goals means we have to get up in the dark to go running, ask for salad instead of fries or turn down a piece of cheesecake.

Casually made resolutions crumble easily when they come up against the cold hard light of reality unless we are especially good at holding ourselves accountable. I know a lot of very responsible people who are coaches and therapists and many of them are not particularly good at the accountability part. So why would you be any different?

That doesn’t mean that change is impossible or even that difficult. Instead of making resolutions, you can focus on clarifying your goals. Identifying your goals goes a long way to keeping you focused and holding yourself accountable. It’s well documented that successful people make goals and stick to them. Perhaps the best resolution is to never make resolutions again. Goals are something you can work toward every day if they stand for things you truly want.

There are plenty of resources that will help you figure out what your goals are, some of which are on my website in the articles and resources section.

A shortcut is to hire a coach who will help you identify your strengths, values, beliefs and passion, all of which will help you recognize your goals. A coach can also help you identify how you get in your own way, preventing you from succeeding (this is oh, so human) and provide accountability, often the biggest reason resolutions and goals fail.

Good luck with your goals in 2011. It’s as good a time as any to start making good things happen in your life.

originally published in Jan. 2010.